I certainly wasn't expecting to come to MUGEN Archive, to this nightmarish message:
"WARNING! Downloads are temporarily deactivated for inactive members, this is a community weekend event."
I have some form of sporadic depression, and knowing that this is an event about community participation hurts. I've never been the one to talk on this website. I've spoken on MFG, but never here. This was just another 'spill my load' website, where I download it and leave, sort of like when a guy 1.5x my age hooks up with a girl, bangs her and departs until next time.
Now knowing that I have to contribute deeply in order to earn my downloads, I am pained. I have Asperger's, and it's the most difficult thing in the world to start a conversation with others, and even participating in one can spare me, since I usually have no idea what to bring up. I also feel like a scrub, since the only games I've really played with a passion are:
* Pokemon series
* M.U.G.E.N. (of course)
* Team Fortress 2
* Super Smash Bros. series
* Call of Duty series (haven't played in three months, though)
I've played Warframe before since my friend forces me to (it's HARD), and I've played a bit of Fire Emblem but never got around to finishing it. EVER. I also have played Mortal Kombat (almost the entire series) and I've never beaten Undertale because of the Mad Dummy.
And knowing that there are other people here that play all of these games, and more that I SHOULD be playing, like classic RPGs, platformers, and lots of delicious hits like Onimusha, Mega Man Legends, Okami, things I've never even touched... It makes me feel like shit, worthless. I want to harm myself, but I just can't... Knowing I'm below all you and I can't contribute... Porquoi?